Even if doubt still lingers …

There are moments, days
Where it is difficult to know
Whether one is alive or death
In this world or in the other, or even in any

Often it is a day
Where feeling are deeply stirred
Shaken and mixed
And where it becomes unclear what it is one feels

Perhaps it is more accurate to say
That it is unclear who one is on such moments
Because of the stirring
All becomes muddled

In such confusion
One discovers a multitude of I’s
Without being able to discern any at all
Who or what am I really ? Or am I at all ?

On such days all seems unreal
All is unclear
Doubt is the strongest feeling
Until the mud settles down

Thirst is a strong feeling then, a longing
The thirst for fresh running and clear water
That could wash away all that mud
Leaving nothing but a current of freshness, almost empty

These days
However confusing
Are also precious
They tell a lot of the mud still running one’s life

They tell how thirsty one is for that fresh emptiness
That is life !
And all that remains then …
Is deep and soothing silence

Even if doubt still lingers …

Katy Pylyser 28-06-2016

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